Resolved Question: I Need Some Advice Please on Subutex/methadone ?
Resolved Question: I need some advice please on subutex/methadone ?
Ok, I am addicted to heroin, I do not want to be addicted to heroin because I know my life could be so much more, I have a beautiful girlfriend I love (who said she would leave me if I don’t stop using heroin) and I love to travel, but heroin withdrawal stops me doing this. Tomorrow I am due to start a buprenorphine (subutex or suboxone) course. I was told by my drugs worker to stop using from tuesday, giving enough time for the buprenorphine to work properly without going into bad withdrawal symptoms. So I didn’t have any heroin tuesday, I was not to bad and I took a couple of dihydrocodeine pills to help. Tuesday night when I went to bed I started to feel bad, very restless and feeling very cold, sweating and I had absolutely no sleep at all. Today I have also been feeling bad, I became really depressed and my symptoms were very uncomfortable. Like an idiot I bought on credit some bags of heroin, (I only smoke it by the way) I was with my mate and between us we smoked 4 bags. The last bit I had was at about 10.00pm. I told myself I will just ask for methadone instead. But now I am not so sure, I know it is highly addictive and I will at some point have to go through withdrawal for it, which I’m told is worse than heroin withdrawal, plus I don’t want to be going to the chemist everyday to get my methadone. The problem is that if I go to see the doctor tomorrow morning, it may be to early to start the buprenorphine. I really don’t know what to do, I either tell my drug worker what happened and ask for methadone, which should make me feel ok straight away, or risk taking the buprenorphine tomorrow ? I started smoking heroin about 15 months ago, for the last 6 months I have used between 2 and 5 bags daily, recently nearer the higher end and sometimes, for example at weekends much more than this. Please don’t judge me, I really want to change but I find it really hard, my best mate uses a lot of heroin, he also buys methadone from the dealer and uses on top, it just keeps him stable at work. He actually gave me a little bit of methadone which I was going to take tomorrow morning, but I’m now thinking this is not the best idea. When I am rattling (withdrawing from heroin) along with the horrible physical pain, I get mentally very, very low. I have the worst thoughts about things, such as my past and my family and girlfriend both of which I love dearly, and how I have ruined everything and at how I feel I can’t cope without heroin. (I am ashamed and never thought my life would go in this direction) Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance.
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